Nightmare State
by CaideSin
Summary: Squall and Seifer discuss the truth of the matter. [Cities of the Future][cannibalism][SquallSeifer, Squall plus Roxas]


**Should read my 'Cities of the Future' first.**

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They don't go to the _Chestnut Tree_ anymore. Not now that Roxas sits there by the front window, his eyes screaming and his mouth hungry, haunting. 

When Seifer calls, Squall knows where to go and he paces up the stairs to his apartment. His body is hurting for the coming violence, the snapping anger he is certain to see coiled in the pits of Seifer's eyes. Squall is prepared and when the door hisses open he says,

"_Shri Rudram_."

Seifer has gotten much faster, much stronger, since the mako treatments began. His control and temper are infinitely shorter. He catches Squall across the face before he even realizes it. His lips are mouthing against the stinging cheekbone just as quickly.

Squall slips inside, the door sliding to a close behind him.

"Is everyone having dinner tonight?" Seifer inquires. Squall thinks he can hear the pleading in his voice, but chooses to ignore it. He shrugs and then pulls his shirt up over his head. This is his _own_ apartment and Seifer shouldn't be here. The hot tang of a SOLDIER's presence pollutes the air, almost as much as a Turks would,

"Or Roxas." Whose voice it is doesn't matter. The thought is the same acknowledged dissidence, until Squall is pressed flat on his bruised back to the floor. His arms pulled up over his head while Seifer traces the dark lines of body hair.

Head to chin to armpit to chest to stomach to groin.

Squall waits the exploration out with patience and silence, while the name Leon is breathed like a torrid curse against the flesh where leg meets pubic bone.

There's a long bought of silence and heated breathing and clawing touches. Squall puts up with these things, just as he puts up with the Rudra's stormy eyed hatred.

"Why..." Seifer whispers. It's been a very short time since the bottom fell out of his heart.

Everyone had loved Sora so terribly, even Seifer hadn't been able to hate him as much as he would have liked and certainly had never wanted to see him die the way he did.

"It wasn't really Roxas' fault," Squall replies.

Seifer bites in reply, beneath the mark Roxas had left with his fangs earlier in the week. Seifer's will be neither as dark nor as deep and that is exactly as emasculating as it should be.

"I personally, would blame Riku," Squall grunts, trying to shift beneath Seifer's weight and failing. "But that wouldn't be as satisfying to you, would it? He already accepted blame and went and banished himself. Where do you think he's gone, Seifer? Where could he have gone?"

"It was that damn drug and it was Roxas."

"You're always were the type to crusade."

Seifer sits up straight and Squall can breath once again. Seifer's mako-jade eyes shift in confusion and then he laughs, low and grating and coughing.

"You've been smoking," Squally agrees in laughter. "You're so desperately lost, that you've been smoking? You can't even get a buzz off it like you used to, not with that mako poisoning your brain."

"This city is shit."

"This city is Hell."

"How long before the Nobodies win Roxas?"

"Never."

"You _trust_ him?"

Squall laughs again and wonders why and Roxas' voice echoes in his head, calling him Leon, the name his mother had once called him before she'd tried to kill him. His father had killed her instead and Squall had run away and never come back. He'd found Irvine crying in an alley and the twins starving perilously close to the wall...

"I love him."

Seifer grinds his teeth before spitting in his face. "But do you trust him?" he whispers, sharp and furious, his fingers digging into Squall's wrists again.

"We know what really killed Sora," Leon replies quietly. "Hearts did. The Nobodies make and sell the shit. You want to blame Roxas unfairly and he wants to blame them. He'll see every last one of them dead, if it's the last thing he does." Seifer's mouth lingers strangely close, devouring every word and every breath.

"And it will be."

"I won't let you kill him." Leon's eyes are half lidded, his payne's gray eyes.

"He can't control himself."

"I will be the one to kill him, Seifer!"

Captain Seifer Almasy's perfectly gelled hair is in disarray around his head and when he releases Leon's wrists, the brunet reaches up and musses it further, dragging the man down to him by his blond locks and smashing their mouths together with a painful ferocity that neither of them mistakes for a kiss.

The violence in them has been fed for too long by Rudra's presence and the mako's siren songs in Seifer's veins.

"You better, Leonhart."

Their eyes meet, dark cloudy skies and bright unfettered energy. "You and I both know Sora was already dead when Roxas got there," Leon whispers, a lover's purr.

"He still lost control."

"You wouldn't?"

"I wouldn't have..."

"I might have."

Seifer's mouth twitches, his anger burning again, his fists balling, so ready to break Squall's delicate flesh, to send a message home to Roxas and Rudra, constantly entwined as they are in that sick parasitic sex.

Instead he gets Leon and Squall, and whoever else is hiding within that thin wiry frame, up on his knees and fucks his body hard, even if he knows it doesn't mean anything anymore. This pain is nothing to all the things Leon and Squall have already lost, each respectively broken, each helplessly in love with a little blond twin who doesn't quite exist any longer.

"Go fucking clean yourself up..." Seifer snarls when he's had his fill, which is never quite enough anymore according to the mako.

He lights a cigarette because Squall is right, about losing his way and feeling that desperate. He blames Roxas, no... he blames Rudra, but since that night just after the boy's fifteenth birthday... they've been one and the same anyway. Seifer just wants Squall to understand it. Is furious that he simply refuses to every time.

The shower starts.

Seifer's smell will still be on these sheets when Roxas comes here later, and for now, that's all the resistance Seifer can give. He's disgusted he can't do more. He's sickened to know it doesn't even bother Roxas to begin with. Rudra probably laughs, in that dark terribly wild voice that comes screeching out of Roxas' thin white throat.

"_Shri Rudram_..." Seifer sighs and then shivers at the very sound of it.

In truth, he still has nightmares about that night. He wakes sweating, wishing he had Squall's body was there with him to break. His sharp exclamations of pain might drown out the sound of the mako screaming, fearful of the demon with the hunting eyes and howling voice and beautiful ivory fangs, dripping with the blood of two innocent twin boys.

श्रि रुद्रम् चमकम्

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**Standard Disclaimers.**

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End file.
